...cause the face aint home, leave a message on the phone.

A little while ago I was listening to “The Michael Baisden Show” as I was driving home and the topic of the show was centered around why when a “brother” says hello to a “sister” on the street, why most “sisters” seem to not respond graciously. Of course the conversation had mixed responses from both men and women as to whether or not men’s intentions are mostly neutral when saying hello. Maybe us women are just way too defensive and presumptuous based off of mass perception. Maybe all men don’t have additional motive to their kindness and sincerely just want to say hello or engage in a platonic association. So I decided to do my own research over the last few months and through a few minor examples, I shall draw my conclusion.

Case #1: Mr. Clichéd
This one was predictable from the start. Anyone who begins a conversation stating that their intentions are companionable are usually only fooling themselves. Upon my conceding I got entangled in several conversations from several different people from the he said she said i thought you said then he said peanut gallery.

Case #2: Mr. Ridiculous
“Why yes sir, I wouldn’t mind taking a look at your business card. Hmmmmm...a business for personal massages? Sounds interesting. You only massage women? Wow. And you’ll come to my house and give me one? Even Better.”

Case #3: Mr. Prove Me Wrong
Curious to see if this young man’s assertions were unadulterated in nature, I decided to take my curiosities on a few train rides to further my suspicion. Sure enough, he’s just a first-rate well-spoken brotha who knows how to take advantage of good networking.

Case #4: Mr. Class of Never Grew Up
One time my extended association was sadly mistaken for “me playing games”. I had to pull out quickly or else face the pain of being taken back to the good old days of St. Peter’s High School.

Case #5: Mr. Bombastic
“Hey how you doin’? I’ve seen you before. I watched you last week over there from my car.” YIKES BROTHA! While I appreciated the forwardness, I didn’t know whether I should be flattered or frightened.

So, 1 out of 5 researched examples proved to be neutral in motive. I choose the word “neutral” and not “good” because a hello and an extension of friendship in hopes of pursuing a relationship does not necessarily make the intention a bad one. However neutral intentions to me, are those that pursue conversation and/or friendship with the sole intentions of friendship that have potential to possibly extend beyond that, yet clever tactics, spooky prophesy, and pushy sentiments resulting in emotional entanglement are completely eradicated from the equation. This research furthermore, did not include the hello’s on the street that I have to say maybe 1 time out of maybe a dozen was genuinely sincere. So my conclusion is this; Women have every right to be defensive at these gestures because it is clearly reflected through experience and study that 90% of the time these encounters are almost never earnestly neutral.

Of course there are some varying factors such as geography (Southern hospitality, foreign locale etc.)