The Adventures of the Black Girl in Her Search for God

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

SOMA-PSYCHE-PNEUMA

Out of the exclusive audience intended for my Orgasm Spasms series, instead of finishing in threefold as anticipated, I decided to single you out. I have enjoyed our frequent conversations exchanging ideas with the other in poised manner. No personal jabs are thrown and most impressively, you’re not angry with me for being a Christian as many others have whined, making conversations near impossible to have. No, you’re not quite atheist, because as an atheist companion of mine once said, “You’re not a real atheist if you’re mad at God for not existing”. You’re not quite postmodernist, as you are not foolish enough to create for yourself a fairytale of a land far, far away where comfort is in the eye of the heterodox. No, you are a naturalist. And I like you...a lot. You’re damn near brilliant. Ooops! Did I say “damn”? Are you sure there are no hidden PhD’s in your back pocket?

As per our conversation earlier, the tri-part being of God is complex. But, so is the tri-part being of man. May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. I find solace in understanding the complexities of one God in three through the nature of the human being: Spirit, Soul and Body. Science has agreed that man is made of parts. Some argue just a soul and body and some will relinquish to the idea of there being a spirit too. Now, we know that the soul inhabits the mind, will and emotions. And the body...well, the body is just the body: a place for the spirit and the soul to exist. The spirit is complex, but we’re all aware that upon death, the body evaporates and the spirit, which inhabits our breathing and our living, and the soul go on. Our soul is not responsible for our breathing and our living. Our spirit man is primary because it is our foremost akin to God. And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. So, if God is in fact, a spirit, and we were made in that image, then our spirit man is the most like Him. Let’s not forget that God said, Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and that “Us” included the Son and the Holy Sprit. Therefore, our spirit, soul and body makeup is a direct reflection of them.

Friend, you’ve expressed to me time and time again, “I have no problems with Jesus. I understand why he was here and all of the things he did. My qualm is with God”. And I say that I think it rather interesting that you don’t have a problem with the Son, but you have a problem with the Father. I have diagnosed your case many times before. You have a problem with all fathers, and any type gender thrust. Hence, it is of no surprise of your vendetta against God the Father. Your case, as unique and independently thinking as you consider yourself, is typical. And your symptoms usually include;
a) rejection of God the Father
b) acceptance of Jesus’ message of hope and love
Let me briefly respond to “b”. Often time extremists, such as yourself, are so over analytical of life and its elements and so critical of Christianity, that when it comes to the substance of Jesus’ message, they become passive. Why is that? They take about 1/3 of His message and then throw it in the Christians face and play their best hand of what I call, the judgment card. Now is not the time to be passive. Let’s examine the totality of His message. To set those captive free. To expose darkness through the existence of light. And who are these captive and what is this darkness? Stop to ask yourself this as you continue to decree love and reception, because it is by those means that the latter part of His message has and will continue to be accomplished. Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.

So I consider WWJD and what I would do is what Jesus would do. I would dine with you and give you a place to lay your head. What man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? I would go to the ends of the earth with you or for you, because I love you with such passion and desperation. If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them goes astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine and go to the mountains to seek the one that is straying? I would plead with God for your life in spite of your constant rejection and persecution towards us and weep for you in my garden in the early hours of the morning. They hated Me without a cause. I would devote my life to freeing you from slavery even if you crusade against me to stay. To heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives...recovery of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed. All in the name of love, I would opt crucifixion for your salvation. And I have declared to them Your name, and will declare it, that the love with which You loved Me may be in them, and I in them.

4 Comments:

  • You're getting there. Dig Deeper!

    By Blogger Khristi Lauren, at 11:00 AM  

  • At this point, it doesn't matter who you hate more because either one is equally unhealthy. It is in my deduction from ample experience that hatred aimed in the wrong direction is disastrous. I don't even find misfortune in pain, if in the end, that pain has produced fruit. So, yes you find more pain and despair, but your digging is in vain. Your endless hole is the result of your desire to seek change as you insensibly obliterate yourself from the equation. If you agree that you are, in fact, the created, then you'll also agree that your sole responsibility is to surrender to the Creator. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, "The Devil made me do it". But, it is lucidly evident that pain and evil exist through man. Therefore, in spite of Satan's tempting and constant badger, man is the subject through which it exists. Man does have free will. Man has the choice to surrender their spirit to evil…to Satan…to unrighteousness. At the end of the day even the bible thrashing Christian exterminators that constantly remind us to love our neighbor and turn the other cheek, associate a bad person with evil. So, when evil visits us who consider ourselves "good", or even "Christian", we are perplexed at how our "good" God could allow such evil to happen to us good people. And I'm definitely not an advocate of the sadist God theory. However, I don't believe that God wishes pain and despair on His children…well pain and despair in vain. You see, man's free will has opened doors of evil to pervade throughout our declining world for centuries and generations. As a result, the "good" have become victimized (especially children [vulnerability]) So the reality of pain cannot be escaped. But it can be overcome. This pain that we experience can be used to glorify the kingdom of God and make a bold statement that this pain will not be in vain. But it's with use of our own free will to surrender our spirit man to it's Creator, that we will conquer this reality. Lewis says, "The human spirit will not even begin to surrender self-will as long as all seems well with it."

    So, you're right. Your life didn't and doesn’t have to be that way. He could stop it. He could change it. But it starts with you.

    Surrender.

    By Blogger Khristi Lauren, at 10:11 PM  

  • In regards to your C.S. Lewis quote: "The human spirit will not even begin to surrender self-will as long as all seems well with it." How can I surrender when all is not well?

    I hate my life and every aspect of it. I hate that I have to endure such obstacles, like my body, when it comes so easy and natural to others. I do realize that others could be stressing over things that are not apparent to me. However, I can't help but be selfish.
    They say be satisfied with the things that you have, and I am grateful. But I can't ignore the things that I want. I cannot surrender to someone I spite, to someone I see, if not all, but a partial culprit to my despair.

    If it begins with me, why doesn't he make it easier for me? If I am to change the way I look by dieting and exercising, why can't he help me get the focus, the energy, the determination I need to be successful? I feel like I'm babbling about questions I already know the answers to, but...
    It’s not fair!

    I've come to realize that this maybe the worse year out of my four years in high school. I thought sophomore year would take the cake, but with prom, colleges, school and other things I don't see a vast improvement coming my way. I've begun to consider what I'm going to have to do for prom. I'm going alone. I have no boyfriend, male members of my family (of age), or friends to go with. I don't want to get my hopes up with the thought of being asked. Moreover I rather go alone than to ask someone, maybe I have too much pride. It may not be as bad as I think it could be, but then again optimism never works in my favor. I just don't want, in the future, to have to show my children a prom picture of myself, alone.

    As for today, this morning to the early afternoon, I kept my head high. I did my best to be optimistic and satisfied with who I am and my current dilemma. By the time I came to the CDC it was gone. I have nothing to be happy about, nothing to look forward to and here I am again babbling on...But prom is not my only concern, there are others.

    I am so hurt and angry. If the causes to my burdens are not in vain than what are their purposes. I can't do it. I am not strong enough to overcome these obstacles and he knows that. He should know that because he created me. Why won't he help me? Why won't he make it easier? I don't want to live but I don't want to die. I wish he had never created me. I didn't ask to be created. I didn't ask for this life. And yet, death at times seems to be the answer to finding salvation. Don't worry, Khristi, I haven't pursued any suicidal attempts, but know the thought has crossed my mind, many times. If I were to die, I realize that some people would be sad, but in the end they would move on with their lives. Therefore, what is my purpose? What do I have to offer this world? NOTHING

    So I'll end with this...
    If God went to the store to buy an item and if the item encompassed, my spiritman, my soulman, and my life, he should have kept the receipt, so he could return me and get his money back.

    By Blogger Khristi Lauren, at 2:14 PM  

  • I think this conversation should go way beyond the confines of a blog comment. My office. Tommorow.

    By Blogger Khristi Lauren, at 7:23 PM  

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