The Adventures of the Black Girl in Her Search for God

Monday, September 11, 2006

Hi.

Hi. My name is Khristi.
I’m afraid of failing.
I’m trying to
hide. From me.
I can’t sleep at night. Because I’m anxious about tomorrow.
But I can’t wait to get to the next day.
I fear losing control of the situation. The situation almost always controls me.
I love the impossible. I’m falling in love with the impossible.
I am so nice, but I am so mean.
Today I’m still a virgin. Tomorrow I’m not sure. I’m way too impulsive.
I’m still getting back at people that hurt me a long time ago.
Though I thought I was over it.
One of my biggest fears is that I don’t know what I’m talking about.
I can’t imagine life without my mom. Please never let me have life without my mom!
I overreact.
I’m competing against myself.
I’m winning.
I’m losing.
I escape into my imagination. And sometimes I don’t come back.
I really love God.
My prayer life is inconsistent.
I’m alone. Enjoying the peace. Missing the company.

1 Comments:

  • You remind me so much of me. Where I was and sometimes where I still am. My words for you are to stay encouraged. There are going to be dark lonely nights and beautifully bright days. There will be warm fuzzy nights and rainy days. Just take one day at a time and rejoice in the positive, learn from the negative, and move forward with a positive frame of mind. I pray all is well with you and yours and I pray that your King finds you soon.
    Blessings,
    Liza Corrine

    By Blogger LizaCorrine, at 8:50 AM  

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